Justin Bieber: Five reasons he's not really retiring

Singer stuns fans by announcing he'll quit after next album, but should we take him seriously?

Briefing LAST UPDATED AT 13:01 ON Wed 18 Dec 2013

THE internet had a seismic OMG moment yesterday when Canadian pop idol Justin Bieber announced he was retiring at the tender age of 19. "After the new album, I'm actually retiring man. I'm retiring," the singer told a DJ at a Los Angeles radio station. Here are five reasons why dumbstruck Beliebers shouldn't take his words too seriously:

He's probably joking

Music industry insiders say it's all a joke, the Daily Mirror reports, and everyone knows that Justin likes a joke as much as the next millionaire pop prodigy. Remember that time he peed in a bucket at a restaurant and shouted "f*** you!" at a picture of Bill Clinton. Priceless, right? And what about his comment that Holocaust victim Anne Frank would probably have been a 'Belieber' had she been able to download his music? The guy should have his own comedy show.

Retirement doesn't mean 'retirement' when you're 19

Let's not forget that Justin has yet to blow out the candles on his 20th birthday cake. When you're 19 the concept of retirement may not mean moving to the coast, joining a golf club and taking out a subscription to Great Naval Battles magazine. Lily Allen also 'retired" a few years ago, announcing on Twitter that she would no longer write, recorded and tour as Lily Allen. Look how well that went.

He's got so much more to give

Justin released his chart-knobbling mega-hit Baby just three short years ago. If he was to retire after the release of his upcoming album, Journals, on 23 December he would leave us with just four albums (and one of those is a Christmas album full of seasonal cover songs). Even the Beatles managed to release about 13 albums.

He just wants to get a bit more life experience

After dropping his retirement bombshell, Bieber told the LA radio station he wants his music to "mature". He added: "I want to grow as an artist and I'm taking a step out, I want my music to mature." A "step out" sounds very different to a retirement. Perhaps the executives at Justin's record label can breathe easy after all.

The fans won't let him retire

Some unkind critics have described Justin's retirement announcement as proof there is a God. Fortunately, they are outnumbered roughly 7,000 to one by the massed ranks of the Beliebers. "My life is now in shambles - if you need me I'll be crying in my room forever!" tweeted Patricia Clark. Fans like Patricia will simply not allow Justin to hang up his sneakers. Did someone say comeback tour? · 

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He is a f uvking asshole. Not for this. But he is just a very very very terrible person. And deserves to be shot 5 times in the face

i just lov justin if he retires i will stop listening musics jb was only one who gav eme the interest of hearing musics but after reading all the five points and checking on all the web pages and i am dam he is not retireing he is just kidding justin you r my inspiration yhanks by muskaan

srrry its not yhanks its thanks

Well. SHIT.

Justin Bieber can't retire he is the only reason I listen to music

Then you need to re-evaluate your life

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