Labour swoops to suspend ‘cash for access’ trio

Labour have moved quickly to suspend Stephen Byers, Patricia Hewitt and Geoff Hoon from the party following their nauseating performances on last night's C4 Dispatches programme when they were secretly filmed by an undercover reporter posing as the representative of a fictitious US lobbying company.

There is no firm evidence that they have broken parliamentary rules on lobbying, but each of them made it very clear to the (hidden) camera that they were keen to exploit their parliamentary experience, and the contacts they had made as senior Cabinet ministers, to make big money opening doors when they leave the Commons at the upcoming election.

Byers, who called himself "a cab for hire", claimed on camera he was already in this line of business, though, as the Mole reported yesterday, he then had a change of heart and wrote to the fictitious company saying he had exaggerated his claims.

This did not detract from his unedifying display. Indeed, what was shocking about last night's film was that despite the advance revelations about its contents, it was actually more sickening that we had been led to expect. The Mole could easily imagine Gordon Brown throwing up his supper as, one by one, the three ex-ministers - and others - boasted of their keenness to influence government policy at a price. Was this why they went into politics?

Surprisingly - given that he made all the running after last year's expenses scandal - David Cameron has been slow to expel the one Tory also fingered by the joint Sunday Times and Dispatches investigation. Perhaps he has been distracted by the news of his 'secret weapon' Samantha's pregnancy.

Anyway, the Tory was Sir John Butterfill, the backbencher who no one had heard of until he was caught up in the expenses scandal. (Not only did he flip his second home to avoid capital gains tax, but the house turned out to have elaborate servants' quarters.)

Sir John also boasted to the female undercover reporter of his ability to fix access to ministers, despite never having risen above the rank of backbencher himself. He also let her into a little secret: he had it on jolly good authority that he was going to to be offered a seat in the Lords when he leaves the Commons, so that could be frightfully helpful too.

The Mole suspects that the elevation of Lord Butterfill-yer-boots is a shade less likely this morning.

Of course, Labour's swift decision to suspend the terrible trio was made easier by the fact that none of them is a friend of Gordon's. Quite the opposite, in fact - Byers is a rampant Blairite and Hewitt and Hoon led the January coup, along with Charles Clarke, to oust Brown as party leader in favour of David Miliband.

Unfortunately, they forget to ask Miliband - or at least failed to to get his agreement - and the putsch collapsed. Are these the sort of people you'd pay £3,000 - £5,000 a day to for parliamentary expertise? ·