Tory plan to tackle hoodies ‘misguided’

Six months after pledging to get tough on anti-social gangs, the Tories have come up with their master plan - seize their mobile phones and bikes. Shadow Home Secretary Chris Grayling has said that taking away a hoodie's mobile for a month would not only "disrupt" gang activity in the area but serve as a stiff lesson to the culprit.

"This would go to the heart of what matters to a Nokia generation of young people," he declared. And if they don't learn their lesson, he wants to go a step further and confiscate their bicycles as well. "In areas where there is a genuine gang culture, such a step could also give police an additional tool to disrupt gang activity," said Grayling.

Labour MPs could hardly stifle their laughter at the proposals, pointing out that the plan has a fatal flaw at its heart.

"Where do the Tories think these hoodie gangs get their mobile phones and bicycles from in the first place? They are stolen!" one Labour backbencher told the Mole. "There's even a test for some gang members, to steal a phone.

"Far from making things better, this proposal could make it worse as anti-social youths have to steal more phones and bikes to replace the ones that have been confiscated. It's bonkers."

Even some Tories, who are happy to abandon David Cameron's "hug a hoodie" approach in favour of a tougher regime, believe Grayling's proposal will never make it into the Tory election manifesto.

Indeed, it is receiving the sort of response Tony Blair suffered when he suggested police or police support officers could haul misbehaving youths off to the nearest cashpoint machine and forced to pay an on-the-spot fine. The proposal was widely ridiculed. ·