Newt Gingrich's big sell: he's not that clown Mitt Romney

SLAPSTICK depends on repetition. The clown always slips in the pile of elephant crap, inevitably walks into the ladder. By such standards Mitt Romney is now the undisputed slapstick king of America. About every four to six weeks the pundits shout out in unison, "That's it. Finally. It's a wrap for Romney!" But then, a week later here's the pile of elephant crap, there's the ladder, and down goes Mitt.  

Just when the Mormon millionaire thought he'd got the nomination sewn up, the polls showed him still stuck at about 23 per cent with huge numbers of Republicans saying they didn't trust the former governor of Massachusetts, that Mormons are in league with Satan, that he took his dog on holiday tied to the roof of his car, that he's a flip flopper, that he made his money firing people, that… On and on.

So there was the Rick Perry challenge. The governor of Texas soared in the polls. He was a cert. Romney raged. Then Perry turned out to be a moron. Romney was on his feet again. A cert. But did his polling numbers surge? Nope. Stuck at 23 per cent and then came another pile of elephant crap, in the form of Herman Cain. Republicans told pollsters they liked Cain's style, his feistiness, his 9-9-9 tax plan, and above all his consummate skill in not being Mitt Romney.

At this point, the pretty smart New York Times conservative columnist Ross Douthat got weary of the slapstick and stated categorically in his column on October 22 that "barring an unprecedented suspension of the laws of American politics, Mitt Romney has this thing wrapped up. Note that I am not saying that he will win every primary or caucus. He could easily lose Iowa to somebody, and if he loses Iowa, he will probably lose some Southern primaries as well, giving political reporters grist for the horse race narrative they crave. But Romney's path to the nomination is more wide open than for any non-incumbent in decades. He should win New Hampshire and Nevada, Florida and Michigan. "

When it emerged that Cain had some sexual harassment problems, plus a very tentative grasp of international affairs, it looked as though Douthat was entirely right – a wrap for Romney.

Inevitability lasted the precise length of time it took to get the elephant back in the ring again. Here we are at the start of December, and a political has-been, an adulterer who dictated harsh terms of divorce to a wife dying of cancer, who has pocketed millions from some of the tackiest corporate lobbies in America, has now roared past Romney, who as usual is face down in elephant crap with the ladder on top on him.

If Republicans are prepared to bet on the has-been – former House Speaker Newt Gingrich - it shows that  the most vehement diehards in America are the Republicans who will never, ever vote for Mitt Romney. There are millions of them.

So Newt is having his hour in the sun. Quite an hour. Nationally in the polls of Republican candidates for the nomination, he's leading Romney 26.6 to 20.4. In Iowa, whose caucuses on January will kick off the year, Gingrich is currently leading Romney 26.3 to 15.

Then, a week later, comes New Hampshire. Relief for Romney. Right now he's leading Gingrich 36.2 to 19.6. But then on January 21 comes South Carolina. Gingrich currently polls 26.3, Romney, 17.7.

Next, the big, all-important state of Florida – one of the crucial swing states in the ultimate election next November. The elephant, please. Not since the robber baron Henry Flagler blazed a path through Florida in the 19th century with his railroad has there been so triumphant a progress through the Sunshine state as Newt's, fittingly ·