Dulux mocks Spurs after signing as sponsor

Dulux has apologised after making fun of Tottenham Hotspur immediately after being signed as the Premier League club’s new sponsor. The paint company said it was “deeply sorry” for a social media post in which it said the English sheepdog used in its adverts “might do a better job” than the club’s current centre backs. Asked if it planned to repaint the trophy cabinet, Dulux replied that surfaces should be “dust free” before painting.

M&S sues over Cuthbert the Caterpillar

Marks and Spencer has launched legal action against Aldi, claiming that the discount supermarket is infringing the trademark of its Colin the Caterpillar cake with its Cuthbert the Caterpillar product. M&S argues that similarities between the two cakes leads shoppers to believe that they are of the same standard and allows Cuthbert to “ride on the coat-tails” of Colin’s hard-earned reputation.

Men regret injecting penises

Two men were hospitalised with swollen penises after they injected them with piles cream to achieve “extra girth”. The dauntless duo had been inspired by a YouTube video that offered “growth tips” to men. Doctors in Strasbourg said the men suffered “progressive painful swelling of the penis” after the cream blocked the lymph vessels in the penis, preventing normal filtering processes.