Tall Tales

Sex Pistols vs. Les Misérables for Jubilee

And other stories from the stranger side of life

A tenor who starred in Les Misérables has told the Sex Pistols that his version of the national anthem, released to mark the Platinum Jubilee, will “wipe the floor” with a punk reissue of God Save the Queen. Alfie Boe said the ageing punks “don’t stand a chance” after he teamed up with Sarah Brightman, the soprano, to release the national anthem in celebration of the Queen’s 70 years on the throne. The Times said many retailers are refusing to stock the reissue of the Pistols’ version, whose lyrics referred to a “fascist regime”.

Agency offers refunds for Bermuda Triangle cruise

A cruise bound for the Bermuda Triangle has promised passengers a full refund if the ship disappears, NDTV reported. Dozens of ships and flights are believed by some to have mysteriously disappeared in the region in the western part of the North Atlantic Ocean. The travel agency, the Ancient Mysteries Cruise, told prospective passengers: “Don’t worry about disappearing on this Bermuda Triangle tour. The tour has a 100% return rate and your money will be refunded in the rare chance you disappear.”

Diplomat slams ‘crappiest fountain’

The husband of New Zealand’s British high commissioner has revealed his verdict on the Wellington bucket fountain, a “polarising water feature that graces the centre of the nation’s capital”, The Guardian reported. Toby Fisher, husband of British commissioner Laura Clarke, tweeted: “After 4 years in Wellington, it’s time to be straight with you all, this is the crappiest fountain ever.” This is a milder verdict than that of Elijah Wood, who once urinated in the fountain while in New Zealand filming The Lord of the Rings.

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